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Reasons for Parental Pressure to Pursue Speci c Careers
4
Children who believe parents wanted them to pursue a speci c career
Parents who report wanting their children to pursue a speci c career
66.4%
Identity
60.8% 49.5%
Percentage of Respondents 28.1%
55.2%
This graph shows the 45% 35.7% 37.6% 33.2%
Copyright (c) 2023 Bedford, Freeman & Worth Publishers. Uncorrected proofs have been used for this sample chapter.
results of a 2021 survey 27.1% 24.0% 23.8% 23.3%
on parental pressure to 17.8%
pursue specific careers.
What counterarguments
does this graph present Good Pride in Potential Continue Achieve more Potential for Increase
to Viet Thanh Nguyen’s earning career for family than parents success prestige for
thesis? How does he potential happiness tradition or could entire family
take over
address them in this family
Distributed by Bedford, Freeman & Worth Publishers. Strictly for use with its products. Not for redistribution.
essay? business
Data from a 2021 Joblist survey of 810 working people and 210 parents.
but when I posed it on Facebook, people of degree in advertising. Then at 33 she quit her
various backgrounds, many of them successful job in corporate public relations, left her native
and creative, responded with their experiences Japan and moved to the United States to
and advice. become an artist. She explained her decision
DIFFERENTIATION There’s no one-size-fits-all solution. this way: “Your parents will pass away eventu-
Circumstances, resources and opportunities ally, and you have to live your life for yourself.”
Connections to World vary widely, as do the motivations of parents
You might bring up the idea of privilege in trying to steer their kids toward or away Getting your parents to tolerate your choices
when Nguyen concedes that “[c]ircum- from particular careers. may be enough.
stances, resources and opportunities vary Beyond concern for their children’s liveli- The parents of Adriana Ramírez are “still not fine 10
widely” (par. 6): some people may find it hood, parents may be trying to protect them from and will never be fine” with her life as a poet, she
more easy to make a choice to pursue their the pain of failure. If so, they’re right — failure told me. But “they simply tolerate my choices
dreams than others, and the parental con- (and penury) is always a risk. Many of us believe because they love me.”
cern about “penury” (par. 7) is perhaps that pursuing our dreams will bring happiness.
more consequential for some people than But perhaps it won’t. It took me over 20 years of Truthfulness is overrated.
others. You could have students discuss struggle to become a writer, but it might have Then there’s the strategy that Zia Haider Rahman,
how the choice to “pursue our passion” been 20 years of struggle to discover that I was not a writer, advises: “Lie.”
(par. 8) ranges in accessibility. For another a writer. Isn’t this just part of the lottery of life? Sometimes that’s the only way to avoid a
perspective on the idea of privilege here, Once we decide to pursue our passion, how pointless confrontation. I have lied often to my
you may choose to have students read best to proceed? Here are some strategies parents, in words or by omission. For example:
Miya Tokumitsu’s essay “In the Name of gleaned from my friends and acquaintances: My father is a devout Catholic who goes to
Love” (2014), in which she interrogates the church every day, and I am an atheist, but when
idea of “do what you love.” Just go for it. I come home to visit, I take him to church and
Yuko Shimizu’s parents wanted a conventional say nothing about what I believe. (Our parents
life for her, so she went to college in Tokyo for a have probably lied to us, too.)
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DIFFERENTIATION
Scaffolding
Starting with paragraph 9, Nguyen presents They might, with partners, raise counter-
brief testimonials from others who pursued arguments to some or all of them: What are
their passions at the expense of their parents’ the potential problems, risks, or pitfalls with
wishes. You could have students examine each approach?
these in several ways. They might draft additional commentary
They might rank them by viability or per- to some or all of them, explaining the ratio-
suasiveness, keeping in mind their own par- nale or benefit of the approach either for the
ents’ personalities. Which approaches might “artists” or for their relationship with their
work best for their parents? Why? parents.

268 chapter 4 / Identity

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