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privately about a girl. The awful word that began ducked down or got down on my hands and
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to occur to me was fast. She’s fast. I wasn’t knees and inched my way to the edge of the
CLOSE READING actually very fast. I was faster than some but not balcony. I think I looked over far enough to
as fast as others. The more I imagined the two see him down there on the sidewalk below —
Ask students to consider the implications boys talking about me the worse I felt. looking up, as I remember it. Or he had gone
of the word “fast” (par. 4). Contextually, Analyzing Short Fiction “I liked boys. I liked the boys I knew in a 5 across the street and was looking up. He didn’t
what is the definition of “fast”? What is the way that was much more innocent than they see me.
effect of the repetition of the word “fast” as probably thought. I trusted them more than “I know that as I crouched there on the
it relates to the woman’s complex attitude girls. Girls hurt my feelings, girls ganged up on balcony or just back from it I had some
about both herself and her situation? Ask me. I always had boys who were my friends, impression of him being puzzled, disconcerted,
students to share their observations with starting back when I was nine and ten and disappointed, at a loss what to do now, not
the whole class.
eleven. I didn’t like this feeling that two boys prepared for this — prepared for all sorts of
© Bedford, Freeman & Worth Publishers. For review purposes only. Do not distribute.
were talking about me. other ways the date might go, other difficulties,
“Well, when the day came, I didn’t want to but not for no date at all. Maybe he also felt
go out to dinner with this boy. I just didn’t want angry or insulted, if it occurred to him then or
the difficulty of this date. It scared me — not later that maybe he hadn’t made a mistake but
because there was anything scary about the boy that I had deliberately stood him up, and not the
but because he was a stranger, I didn’t know way I did it — alone up there in the apartment,
him. I didn’t want to sit there face-to-face in uncomfortable and embarrassed, chickening
some restaurant and start from the very out, hiding out — but, he would imagine, in
beginning, knowing nothing. It didn’t feel right. collusion with someone else, a girlfriend or
And there was the burden of that boyfriend, confiding in them, snickering over
recommendation — ‘Give her a try.’ him.
“Then again, maybe there were other “I don’t know if he called me, or if I answered 10
reasons. Maybe I had been alone in that the phone if it rang. I could have given some
apartment so much by then that I had retreated excuse — I could have said I had gotten sick or
into some kind of inner, unsociable space that had to go out suddenly. Or maybe I hung up
was hard to come out of. Maybe I felt I had when I heard his voice. In those days I did a lot
disappeared and I was comfortable that way and of avoiding that I don’t do now — avoiding
did not want to be forced back into existence. confrontations, avoiding difficult encounters.
I don’t know. And I did a fair amount of lying that I also don’t
“At six o’clock, the buzzer rang. The boy was do now.
there, downstairs. I didn’t answer it. It rang “What was strange was how awful this felt.
again. Still I did not answer it. I don’t know how I was treating a person like a thing. And I was
many times it rang or how long he leaned on it. betraying not just him but something larger,
I let it ring. At some point, I walked the length of some social contract. When you knew a decent
the living room to the balcony. The apartment person was waiting downstairs, someone you
was four stories up. Across the street and down a had made an appointment with, you did not just
flight of stone steps was a park. From the not answer the buzzer. What was even more
balcony on a clear day you could look out over surprising to me was what I felt about myself in
the park and see all the way across town, maybe that instant. I was behaving as though I had no
a mile, to the other river. At this point I think I responsibility to anyone or anything, and that

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DIFFERENTIATION
Scaffolding
Ask students to consider how the woman’s Google Jamboard, Padlet, on large Post-its,
contradictory or inconsistent traits impact the or using the TRM document) to analyze and
reliability of her as a narrator of her own story. note the speaker’s motivation (column 1),
Specifically, consider the shift found in the actions (column 2), and reactions to and
phrases: “In those days I did a lot of avoiding thoughts about the boy (column 3). Then, ask
that I don’t do now — avoiding confrontations, students to review each group’s observations
avoiding difficult encounters. And I did a fair through a gallery walk. You may wish to ask
amount of lying that I also don’t do now” to students to respond using small Post-its or
“What was even more surprising to me was through the digital comments.
what I felt about myself in that instant. I was
behaving as though I had no responsibility to TRM Graphic Organizer
anyone or anything . . .” Ask students in small A graphic organizer for this activity can be
groups to use a graphic organizer (created in found in the Teacher’s Resource Materials.

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